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Margaret Bennett's avatar

Sharp as a tack Wendy. I was half expecting Eamon Andrews. I loved that Pentangle track. Thank you for highlighting the beauty of memoirs and yours are always insightful. Let’s hope that Substack gets on board. You’re always introducing me to good writers. Thank you.

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Wendy Varley's avatar

Thank you, Margaret. Your essays would often fit a Memoir category too. Always a great read.

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Deborah Vass's avatar

What a treat this was! I have always loved memoir and devoured the Simone de Beauvoir when I was a student. I loved May Sarton's too and, if letters count too, the Lyttleton - Hart Davis letters were wonderful.

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Wendy Varley's avatar

Thank you, Deborah. I’m not familiar with May Sarton or the Lyttleton/Hart Davis letters, so will add those to my own discovery list!

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Francesca's avatar

Echoing Deborah’s nod to May Sarton!!

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Lyndsey Resnick's avatar

This was a fantastic read! Well done. You and I read many of the same things at the same times in life. I need to find some of these to read and re-read, it's been so long. Thank you for the reminder about how our life experiences meld and overlap. And my goodness, yes, the yard baths. Sometimes my parents would just bring the shampoo outside. No use in wasting water. ;)

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Wendy Varley's avatar

Thanks, Lyndsey. Glad some of these reads were your favourites too. The spines on some of these books are broken from use, but it was good to scan through them again today, as it’s been a long time since I read most of them.

Hope your bathing facilities are a bit more comfortable these days :D

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Anna Schott's avatar

Not memoir but I read Tolstoy's rather tortured youthful diaries when I was a teenager and tried to model my behaviour off of them. Diana Athill wrote a few absolutely super fantastic memoirs.

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Wendy Varley's avatar

Crikey, modelling yourself on Tolstoy as a teen sounds a challenge, Anna. Kudos! I haven’t read his teenage diaries. I imagine the life that led up to him writing War and Peace must have been interesting. Or was he just moping about?!

I’ve read a lot about Diana Athill, but still not got round to reading her memoirs. I need to do that!

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Ros Barber's avatar

Excellent post, Wendy. I find memoir an excellent portal to compassion and human connection. It deserves its own tab.

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Wendy Varley's avatar

Thanks, Ros. Yes, I find memoir good for the soul! I love a warts and all life story.

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Emma Parsons's avatar

Love this, Wendy. Thank you. I discovered you via a restack in Notes. I’m going to do the same and spread your call for a memoir tag. The Four Marys feature in mine, by the way!

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Wendy Varley's avatar

Oh, thank you, Emma! Glad you have fond memories of The Four Marys too!

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Ann Kennedy Smith's avatar

Thanks for the shoutout Wendy, and glad to have helped to get the ball rolling... so many good things in your post and the comments too. (How could I have forgotten Diana Athill?) My passion this summer has been Frances Partridge's Diaries. For some reason I started with 'Hanging On' the volume that starts in 1963 and I'm thrilled to discover she published more after that. Everyone I've lent Bess Kalb's sweet, funny Nobody Will Tell You This But Me has loved it (she's on Substack too).

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Wendy Varley's avatar

Thank you, Ann. It was great to see all the recommendations on your thread. And new ones here, too. I’ve got a lot more reading to do!

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Prajna O'Hara's avatar

Wow, what a rich "This is Your Life" essay. I admit I need to come back to track more carefully as I am older but a late bloomer in the literary world.

This fills me with delight to zoom in on these authors, more than half I know, but have not read fully.

I will come back to this. Thank you.

I have read all of Abigail Thomas. She writes like no other and has given mine stunning appreciation.

I just finished "Getting Over Tom." it is hard for me to believe it is not memoir. I love everything she writes.

Substack is better than an MFA, as I hav e found great writers are not holding fast to rules.

I poured blood, sweat and tears into my memoir Edge of Grace, Fierce Awakening to Love — next month is a 10 year anniversary with a revised version. The first edition took seven years. I had 0 confidence in my writing, was rule bound, and blamed myself for too many things.

Writing is a freedom that took me to the belly of the beast and set who I truly am aflame.

I look forward to coming back to this and adding to my reading list.

Good to learn more about you — Wendy's World.

"It whetted my appetite for reading memoirs and diaries. I craved guidance on how to live and how to push the boundaries.

In my early twenties I devoured everything by Anaïs Nin

The famous quote, “We do not see things as they are, we see them as we are,” is hers."

Exactly, Thank you!

Here is my memoir: https://prajnaohara.com/shop/

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Wendy Varley's avatar

Thanks, Prajna. There is so much out there to read. We’re never going to get to more than a fraction of it, but it’s great to compare notes on some of our favourites.

Also, thank you for the link to your memoir.

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Jill Swenson's avatar

Loved the quiz. Of the memoirs I have read on the list, I recognized most. So much to say in praise of memoir and I'm lost when it comes to threads and as I can barely manage Notes. Digital overload today when I've got a a sick dog. Flagging to reread later.

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Wendy Varley's avatar

Thank you, Jill. Glad you enjoyed the quiz!

Notes can be confusing, but I’m finding it useful to share ideas and pieces I’ve enjoyed and to find pieces and writers I might not have noticed otherwise. I find it easier to navigate on my desktop, where I can see properly, my fat fingers aren’t a hindrance and I have a proper keyboard!

Hope your poorly dog improves.

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Nancy Jainchill's avatar

Oh, I love this. The "quiz" what fun. I recently read Elizabeth McCracken's book. OW.

And, I took was immersed in Anais Nin's diaries, all of her writings, actually. Thank you for bringing me back to them.

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Wendy Varley's avatar

Thank you, Nancy. Glad you enjoyed the quiz!

Yes, the way Anais Nin has been viewed differently over time is really interesting. I think she was ahead of her time with the way she broke boundaries. I found reading her in my early twenties very liberating.

I realised when Elizabeth's book came out in 2008 that she'd had a similar experience to me: stillbirth, followed by another baby. Pregnancy after loss brings up such complex feelings.

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Rachael Rosewell's avatar

This has jogged so many memories for me; the Four Marys, Take Three Girl, Anaïs Nun, Frost in May and also opened up a whole new world of things to read. I do so love a quiz. Thanks Wendy!

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Wendy Varley's avatar

Thanks, Rachael, glad you enjoyed and it stirred some memories. Sounds like we have a lot of reading in common!

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Heather Cawte's avatar

Oh, Wendy, I could almost recreate your photo here! I discovered Betty MacDonald at around the same age as you - and, indeed, via the same title - and I now own copies of almost all her books. She is a regular reread for me.

Also, Frost in May and its sequels - in fact, I have the same edition as you. I absolutely love menoirs. People have had such extraordinary lives, and most of the time, if they were put into a novel, readers would not be able to believe such things could happen!

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Wendy Varley's avatar

How wonderful that our influences overlap, Heather! Yes, truth really is so often stranger than fiction. Thanks so much for reading and taking time to comment.

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petrichor's avatar

loving it (getting more and more intrigued by nin). and 100% agree on the memoirs tab (still waiting... truly can't believe there's a crypto tab but not memoir).

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Wendy Varley's avatar

Thank you for reading and for your comment, petrichor. Anaïs Nin has been in and out of fashion, but I always admired her. And yes, still no news on a memoir tab. Weird what gets a tab and what doesn't. Quite happy to opt out of crypto notifications!

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Kay Stratton's avatar

Love this post, Wendy. I just submitted my memoir for the first time to an agent this week, and I hate to admit I've never been much of a reader of memoir. Your list has really given me some great ideas of who to start with - I did study some Simone de Beauvoir at uni, so I will probably start there. You mentioned linking to one of our own posts, and thought you might like this one https://kayleidogyn.substack.com/p/itll-be-ok Thanks again! Oh... I messaged Substack too, asking for a memoir tab! I still think they need to expand into that.

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Wendy Varley's avatar

Thanks Kay. Wishing you all the luck with your memoir submission. Thanks for adding to the call for a Memoir tab. I will check out your link, thank you! x

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Kay Stratton's avatar

Thank you x

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Anna Sheremetev's avatar

There is this thing about your childhood when you are absolutely sure in something - but then you grow up. As a reader with Russian background, I’m moved towards next piece of reading memoirs from the UK by you. From my side, have you tried Chekhov’s memoirs written by his brothers? It’s special!

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Wendy Varley's avatar

Thank you for reading and commenting.

I haven’t read Chekhov’s memoirs, but someone else here mentioned them recently. I’ll have to take a look, thank you!

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Wendy Martin's avatar

So interesting, now I have added many memoirs to my must-read list. Thanks, Wendy

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