I gulped this down in one huge swallow - and I was right back then with the feel of More! - consuming the problem pages but more, living another's true life. I have a sense I must have read this then, when my one daughter was born, my one son three. And what a lovely story - truly. Thank you Wendy
and thank you for including fab links to dating stories - you're a great substacker to know.
Thanks so much, Cherry. Maybe you did read it back then. It's been really good to revisit it and share it with the (now grown up) kids! I do enjoy reading other people's dating stories, too, whether hits or misses. x
An incredible story Wendy, beautifully written. It had me gripped. I knew you’d had triplets young, but 10 months after you met- that’s incredible. I doubt it has been easy, but it’s a wonderful thing to know that you’re approaching 40 years together. Congratulations.
Hi Wendy, I loved every moment of your story! So many lines moved me. Too much to mention right now. I am in the midst of packing, surrounded by boxes and papers begging for a home. But I had to stop to read this. Ok, now back to packing. Warmest Andrea
Ah, thank you so much, Andrea! I was thinking about you as I started drafting something about hands and remembered your earlier piece. That’s for another week, though! Hope the move goes smoothly. Good luck with it.
Thanks Georgina. The best things in my life have happened when I’ve dared to leap in the deep end! As Ian said (or rather quoted), “What the hell is always the best decision to make!”
And yes, More! was a fantastic magazine. Loved contributing to it.
Wow Wendy this post took me on a journey. Read the first two thirds or so on the ferry over to IoW - up to the head-swimming happiness of your first date 🥰 But then I got distracted and only just finished reading the rest this morning. Triplets! And all in the first year of your relationship! With a start like that you guys were clearly meant to be. Also loved the pre-Ian date anecdotes. I did a lot of (unsuccessful 😄) early online dating about 20 years ago - peak Guardian Soulmates era. Brought back memories I am VERY glad to have left behind…!
Thanks for reading and commenting, Vicki! I love reading about blind dates, whether hits or misses, and I always like to find out how people met if they are in a lasting relationship. So many fascinating stories out there.
Oh I absolutely loved this, Wendy. What a brilliant story it is.
I loved More, too. I’d have been about ten when this came out and it was from there that the adult world unfolded before us. My sister and I made a dating agency with an old Rolodex file of my dad’s. We had no clients but created characters to match up, then imagined their Blind Dates. We got told off for putting up a poster for our agency in the village.
I think this story should get another airing in a magazine 40 years on!
Beautifully written and full of life. Thank you for sharing it. X
Thank you, Kate, for such kind words, and for restacking it! More! was a great magazine.
I love hearing about your dating agency with no clients and being told off for your poster in the village. That's really funny. How enterprising you and your sister were! Maybe you should write about that?
!!!! Wow... this was such a DELIGHTFUL read, in every way. 💕 As someone who is very much single, the thought of dating in a NON DIGITAL WORLD sounds so much better. 😭 Hand written letters?!?! NON instant means of communication?! PHONE CALLS?! Yes please. 😌 The ad you placed is absolutely GENIUS, btw. Love love love the creativity and LOVE that's how you met your husband! ALSO, pregnant after a month with TRIPPLETS?!?!?! Bless!!!! Such an amazing story 🥰🥰🥰
Ah, thank you for this wonderful feedback, Megan! It’s been fun to share it again, including with my kids. Well, you know, all grown up now and they knew the story, but all the deets.
I wrote about a weekend on a dating app at 66—that I quit after 3 responses. I too would prefer the old fashioned letter.
So many good lines here: I was nearing the end of De Beauvoir’s book, The Mandarins at the time, and wistfully dreaming of brilliant minds pondering the meaning of life and freedom and politics, and having Affairs with a capital A.
Was this him, then? My Sartre of the Eighties? I put pen to paper. “Dear Sartre,” I began, “Does this mean you’re ugly with a gammy eye?”
"I inhaled deeply and stifled the urge to laugh hysterically as images of Paddington Bear filled my head. I changed my mind about looks not counting."
My ad read:
“ENDANGERED SPECIES?
Creative, intelligent, unattached men close to extinction, or so I’m beginning to think. I’m 25, female, interested in the arts, pop music, dancing, food. I’ve got a brain, two eyes, a nose a mouth etc, all very nice. I can’t believe that’s unique. Come on chaps, give me a sign!”
A must read, so fun, insightful — maybe even optimistic!
Thank you, Prajna, and thanks for sharing it, too. I just realised when I looked at the dashboard you’re the 1000th person to read it! I hope it spreads a bit of optimism.
What a wonderful story, Wendy! (And a reference to More magazine!)
I returned to the world of dating seven or eight years ago, having turned 40 and thrown my (not very kind to me) husband out. I found online dating fun, honestly, although I rarely went on a second date. I met the one for me by chance on a Discord server! We are so well matched, but we are having almost the complete opposite story to you and your husband. It is going soooo slowly, due to his being in Knoxville, TN and due to us both being as poor as church mice!
Wendy! So much respect for this story and your hutzpah to hike to the mountain top to get the love you knew you wanted, and all the bonuses it bestowed!
Thank you, Michelle. What a beautiful way to put it. It did feel like a hike to the mountain top, everything about that year. Very touched by your comment.
Just peeked at your own Substack and spied a very dramatic photo. I will explore further!
Isn't it funny how "you just know". Met my husband through a very early online dating site and we hit it off instantly, though our children came after a few years. I enjoyed your story very much.
Oh, thank you - that’s so lovely to hear that it worked for you, too! I feel like modern apps are missing a trick re the handwritten envelope and letter!
Thank you, Ros. It’s good to share it with the (now grown up) children. Though they of course already know the epic tale!
Your supportive words to me on Substack a few weeks ago on the comments on one of your own pieces helped me to work out why I’d lost writing confidence and pluck up the courage to share more. Thank you for that.
This story blew me away!!!!! Well written and I’m so happy you found your person. I can’t imagine that situation working for many couples, but obviously you two must be some hell of a team.
Thank you so much, Paige. Yes, in theory you'd think it shouldn't have worked out, but life is full of surprises! And yes, there has been a lot of team work. We balance each other out.
I gulped this down in one huge swallow - and I was right back then with the feel of More! - consuming the problem pages but more, living another's true life. I have a sense I must have read this then, when my one daughter was born, my one son three. And what a lovely story - truly. Thank you Wendy
and thank you for including fab links to dating stories - you're a great substacker to know.
Thanks so much, Cherry. Maybe you did read it back then. It's been really good to revisit it and share it with the (now grown up) kids! I do enjoy reading other people's dating stories, too, whether hits or misses. x
An incredible story Wendy, beautifully written. It had me gripped. I knew you’d had triplets young, but 10 months after you met- that’s incredible. I doubt it has been easy, but it’s a wonderful thing to know that you’re approaching 40 years together. Congratulations.
Thank you, Margaret. It was the biggest surprise! Those early years were a whirlwind and hard work, but it’s been a blast. We’re very lucky.
What a story. Triplets! Just like that.
Thank you, Nancy. 1986 was a rollercoaster of a year!
And you all survived!
We hadn’t a clue, but muddled through. Youth, love and optimism!
Hi Wendy, I loved every moment of your story! So many lines moved me. Too much to mention right now. I am in the midst of packing, surrounded by boxes and papers begging for a home. But I had to stop to read this. Ok, now back to packing. Warmest Andrea
Ah, thank you so much, Andrea! I was thinking about you as I started drafting something about hands and remembered your earlier piece. That’s for another week, though! Hope the move goes smoothly. Good luck with it.
The best how we met story ever! Xx
Ha! You saw it all unfold! What a whirlwind.
Love this story, Wendy! Fortune favours the brave - and you were both brave and lucky!
Also I loved More! magazine, so extra kudos for being featured :)
Thanks Georgina. The best things in my life have happened when I’ve dared to leap in the deep end! As Ian said (or rather quoted), “What the hell is always the best decision to make!”
And yes, More! was a fantastic magazine. Loved contributing to it.
I'm happy for you! And triplets... what a wild time you must have had!!
Thanks, Georgina. Yes, “You must have your hands full!” was the refrain wherever we went for about the next ten years!
Oh my gosh, I can imagine! 🤣
Wow Wendy this post took me on a journey. Read the first two thirds or so on the ferry over to IoW - up to the head-swimming happiness of your first date 🥰 But then I got distracted and only just finished reading the rest this morning. Triplets! And all in the first year of your relationship! With a start like that you guys were clearly meant to be. Also loved the pre-Ian date anecdotes. I did a lot of (unsuccessful 😄) early online dating about 20 years ago - peak Guardian Soulmates era. Brought back memories I am VERY glad to have left behind…!
Thanks for reading and commenting, Vicki! I love reading about blind dates, whether hits or misses, and I always like to find out how people met if they are in a lasting relationship. So many fascinating stories out there.
Oh I absolutely loved this, Wendy. What a brilliant story it is.
I loved More, too. I’d have been about ten when this came out and it was from there that the adult world unfolded before us. My sister and I made a dating agency with an old Rolodex file of my dad’s. We had no clients but created characters to match up, then imagined their Blind Dates. We got told off for putting up a poster for our agency in the village.
I think this story should get another airing in a magazine 40 years on!
Beautifully written and full of life. Thank you for sharing it. X
Thank you, Kate, for such kind words, and for restacking it! More! was a great magazine.
I love hearing about your dating agency with no clients and being told off for your poster in the village. That's really funny. How enterprising you and your sister were! Maybe you should write about that?
!!!! Wow... this was such a DELIGHTFUL read, in every way. 💕 As someone who is very much single, the thought of dating in a NON DIGITAL WORLD sounds so much better. 😭 Hand written letters?!?! NON instant means of communication?! PHONE CALLS?! Yes please. 😌 The ad you placed is absolutely GENIUS, btw. Love love love the creativity and LOVE that's how you met your husband! ALSO, pregnant after a month with TRIPPLETS?!?!?! Bless!!!! Such an amazing story 🥰🥰🥰
Ah, thank you for this wonderful feedback, Megan! It’s been fun to share it again, including with my kids. Well, you know, all grown up now and they knew the story, but all the deets.
Awe, I LOVE that you can share this story with them. So special!! 💛
This is SOO good. I am still laughing...
I wrote about a weekend on a dating app at 66—that I quit after 3 responses. I too would prefer the old fashioned letter.
So many good lines here: I was nearing the end of De Beauvoir’s book, The Mandarins at the time, and wistfully dreaming of brilliant minds pondering the meaning of life and freedom and politics, and having Affairs with a capital A.
Was this him, then? My Sartre of the Eighties? I put pen to paper. “Dear Sartre,” I began, “Does this mean you’re ugly with a gammy eye?”
"I inhaled deeply and stifled the urge to laugh hysterically as images of Paddington Bear filled my head. I changed my mind about looks not counting."
My ad read:
“ENDANGERED SPECIES?
Creative, intelligent, unattached men close to extinction, or so I’m beginning to think. I’m 25, female, interested in the arts, pop music, dancing, food. I’ve got a brain, two eyes, a nose a mouth etc, all very nice. I can’t believe that’s unique. Come on chaps, give me a sign!”
A must read, so fun, insightful — maybe even optimistic!
Thank you, Prajna, and thanks for sharing it, too. I just realised when I looked at the dashboard you’re the 1000th person to read it! I hope it spreads a bit of optimism.
Wow, and perhaps that is a lucky number for me, as I am sure I have intentionally or not pursued the 'lucky one' 1000 times. LOL
What a wonderful story, Wendy! (And a reference to More magazine!)
I returned to the world of dating seven or eight years ago, having turned 40 and thrown my (not very kind to me) husband out. I found online dating fun, honestly, although I rarely went on a second date. I met the one for me by chance on a Discord server! We are so well matched, but we are having almost the complete opposite story to you and your husband. It is going soooo slowly, due to his being in Knoxville, TN and due to us both being as poor as church mice!
Thank you, Emma! Yes – More! magazine was great to contribute to.
Glad to hear you've found someone via Discord. Long distance relationships are a challenge, good luck to you both.
Thank you. Three years and counting... We will get there!
A comedy turned romance. Great to know the personal backstory.
Thank you, Jill. It’s been a treat reminiscing and sharing it with people.
Shoutout to @Paula Rich Estes for sharing this!
Wendy! So much respect for this story and your hutzpah to hike to the mountain top to get the love you knew you wanted, and all the bonuses it bestowed!
I celebrate you and share in your Joy!
Thank you, Michelle. What a beautiful way to put it. It did feel like a hike to the mountain top, everything about that year. Very touched by your comment.
Just peeked at your own Substack and spied a very dramatic photo. I will explore further!
Isn't it funny how "you just know". Met my husband through a very early online dating site and we hit it off instantly, though our children came after a few years. I enjoyed your story very much.
Oh, thank you - that’s so lovely to hear that it worked for you, too! I feel like modern apps are missing a trick re the handwritten envelope and letter!
Also, belatedly, thank you very much for restacking! Really thoughtful of you.
Wow. What an incredible story. I am so thrilled for you both/all that it is still going strong.
Thank you, Ros. It’s good to share it with the (now grown up) children. Though they of course already know the epic tale!
Your supportive words to me on Substack a few weeks ago on the comments on one of your own pieces helped me to work out why I’d lost writing confidence and pluck up the courage to share more. Thank you for that.
This story blew me away!!!!! Well written and I’m so happy you found your person. I can’t imagine that situation working for many couples, but obviously you two must be some hell of a team.
Thank you so much, Paige. Yes, in theory you'd think it shouldn't have worked out, but life is full of surprises! And yes, there has been a lot of team work. We balance each other out.